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Man accidentally releases 250 live crickets in his house, hilarity ensues

Who hasn’t accidentally unleashed a real-life biblical plague in their home before, really?

Chris Ingraham is a reporter for The Washington Post and on Twitter recently recounted quite an amazing tale involving a shipment of live crickets intended to feed the bearded lizard he adopted. To be sure, Chris’s recounting of the incident that unfolded is quite good, and quite funny, but we all know it’s the stuff of nightmares too. Ingraham’s cricket tweets have since gone viral.

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It all started when a FedEx delivered a box full of live crickets. It being the first time he’d done such a thing, and much to all our eventual delight, Chris had no idea what he was in for.

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The result of Chris opening the box of crickets, with no prior knowledge of what to expect, had about the kind of result you’d expect. At least if you were writing a sitcom pilot in the 1990’s for TGI Friday.

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He even gave some forethought into where he might able to stash the box of crickets away from the rest of his pets and his children until he could figure out how to deal with all of them.

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That is definitely not how it all worked out though. Because very soon after stashing the crickets, all Hell broke loose and a plague was unleashed upon the Ingraham home. To add a little more drama, Chris *may* have forgotten to brief his wife about the cricket sitch.

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Chris knew he had to put a pin in the story he was writing and help his wife in the kitchen. He tried to explain things to her, but she was not in need of expository information at the time.

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The next few tweets are some of my favorite in the whole story. They read like a scene from The Simpsons. You know, when it was still good and stuff?

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He figures out he must not have sealed the box as tightly as he should have. Ingraham rushes out into the snowy cold and grabs an aquarium, spending the next 45 minutes collecting them. In another great moment, he realizes that not everyone in the house is terribly bothered by the reliving of Exodus in his home.

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Chris then plays the “shittiest” Pokemon game of his life and tells us that even hours later, they were still finding random crickets.

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Sadly, Chris didn’t get any pics or videos of the event, though. However, he had a pretty funny way to put a button on the whole thing in his observation about his lack of both. What a fun story, for people not terrified of terrifying things.

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https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js

Chris wrote about his hilariously harrowing night in a piece published in The Washington Post.


Writer/comedian James Schlarmann is the founder of The Political Garbage Chute and his work has been featured on The Huffington Post. You can follow James on Facebook and Instagram, but not Twitter because he has a potty mouth.

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